Are you restraining yourself?

"Why can't I do the best that I can do?", asks Dash, unhappily, to his mum, Elastigirl, in The Incredibles.

Great question, isn't it? In the Incredible, Dash's mum replies, "Right now, the world just wants us to fit in, and to fit in, we need to be like everyone else". But is that the world we live in? I believe it isn't. The world we live in allows us to be our best. The people around us want to be our best. And yet, we are the ones who hold ourselves back from being our best. Unlike Dash, it is not society and others around us who are stopping us from unleashing our abilities, we stop ourselves by thinking the same limiting thoughts, repeating the same behaviours and routinely doing what does not help.


In our work life...
We might stay in a job and keep doing what have been even though it is not what we really want because we are scared to take the risk of moving or because we don't know what it is we do want.
We might stay in conflict with others or keep bearing undesirable feelings about work because of our pride or our fear of admitting our limitations or telling the truth about our feelings.
We might believe others who have what we want are 'luckier' than us because we think we cannot do what they have done to get there and that we do not have the means. So we keep doing exactly what we've been doing.


But is it others telling you to be scared are you the one too scared to do something to change the situation? Is it up to others to realise what you want or is it you who needs to find out what you want? If others will not change and you do something about the situation, would things ever change or would they continue as it is? If something isn't working and you keep doing the same thing, how can you expect to get different results?


NLP Coaching at CCC Travel helps you move in the right direction to get what you want and have more enjoyable and desirable job and career experiences breaking your old habits, routines and ways of thinking and opening yourself to new possibilities.


To close your mind is like having a handcuff that only lock tighter as you struggle through each day.


With CCC Travel, it is like unclenching your fist and being able to grasp all the new and better possibilities.

Destruction of your career with minor fears

Almost everyone has some form of irrational fear.  Clearly severe fears or phobias can interfere with normal day-to-day jobs - one with severe claustrophobia might feel the need turn down a job that involves taking a lift.

One with a severe fear of heights may give up on a better paid job working in a high rise.

One with social phobia may avoid working with others at all costs to avoid being judged.

However, minor fears or anxieties can also interfere with your own performance in the long term. If you feel anxious in enclosed places you might find yourself feeling uncomfortable every time you step into the enclosed office of your boss, feeling woozy every time you are asked to attend a conference with a large group, or making excuses to miss important meetings with others located in small rooms. With a slight fear of heights, you may find yourself taking the time and expending more fuel to drive an extra 10 miles to avoid a tall bridge, avoid speaking to team colleagues sitting by windows, or venture less down the flights of stairs to interact with other departments. They may seem insignificant each time, yet these fears aren't going to go away if you do not do anything about it, and over time, these little things can amount and impact on your work, for example, leaving you with negative feelings about your boss or reluctant to give to conferences that provide you with opportunities, or damaging your ability to save money or network and gain reputation.



Even worse, as time goes by the fear can get worse and become more severe. We've all heard about Pavlov's conditioning or know about how training a dog works. We tell a dog to sit and give it a reward when it does and by repeating this, the dog learns to associate sitting with a reward. Unfortunately humans as just like animals when it comes to learning. Only with fears the reward is not a good one. The first few times you see or experience your fear, it causes you anxiety you cannot control. Each time it occurs again, the association strengthens. After some time, just thinking about the feared object of situation will make you nervous and each time that occurs, the association is strengthened even further in our neural connections. You can imagine what could happen with time if you let your fears continue.

Right now, we all have a choice, to keep these severe or minor fears, which prevent us from living the life in the most enjoyable way, or to live a carefree life without fear. Why would you choose to keep the fears and let them potentially become more severe? Why are you CHOOSING to let them inconvenience you and make you change your lifestyles to accommodate them when you don't even want or need?

Here are just some of the typical fears we may have:

Fear of public speaking - fear of social situations where you may be judged, embarrassed or humiliated
Do you really want to avoid career advancing opportunities to present to others and make yourself know, or be talked about as the manager or leader who cannot or avoids speaking directly to large teams?

Fear of failure - fear of taking risks and inclination to play it safe
Do you really want to pass up valuable opportunities and learn from less useful options to make better choices?

Fear of rejection - fear of feeling undesired, 
Do you really want to regret doing things, finding out what could have happened and missing opportunities?

Fear of conflict - fear of expressing your true feelings, opinions, wants and desires
Do you really want to create a lack of understanding and cause conflict with others as a result of having this fear or conflict within yourself from not be truthful about your true self?

Fear of success - the fear of being more superior and different from others and having what others are seeking
Do you really want to never be successful by holding on to this fear and have something to be proud of, something you have achieved?

Fear of making decisions - fear of choosing, making wrong choices, and the inclination to procrastinate to avoid decisions
Do you want to continue letting others take credit for the right decisions or tread on all opportunities to advance to more senior positions where decisions are required?


Why not receive your free half hour consultation to find out more about how my NLP coaching can help you. Just visit my CCC Travel website

Ever ridden a kangaroo?

So having grown up in Australia, people I encountered always used to joke by asking whether we rode kangaroos to school.

Unfortunately, kangaroos are not on my list of animals I have ridden and I have, so far, not encountered anyone who has 'ridden' a kangaroo before, but I have taken other fun and interesting means of 'green' transport:


- Horses - Though typical, horses are by far my favourite to ride. They are a bit like children - some are lazy and need the good old kick, some have fears and will go to lengths to walk around and avoid water or pavement, and some are cheeky, testing you to see what they can get away with doing, or not doing. If you've ridden a horse and have managed to control it, what's stopping you from doing the same in your own life and taking control? Currently, my next travel expedition in relation to horses is a horseride in the countryside of Wales. If you're up for some fun with your family, friends or other half and enjoy the smells and views of the greenery, why not take a trail ride in the forest suitable for all abilities and meet the wild cows and horses on the way?

- Camels - Despite how elegant camel riding always seems to look in the deserts, I must say they drool and spit much more than one would like! Perhaps it is also the never-ending chewing motion of the mouth that puts me off. Nevertheless, I would certainly not pass up a camel ride across a dessert and they would certainly be a decent means of transport in some places. One question that pops into my mind as a think this is whether riding a one-hump camel would be different? Perhaps that will be what I try next

- Ox - They're actually quite comfortable for a decent sized person but I can't imagine I could say the same for those with shorter legs! Wrapping your legs comfortably around them could prove difficult. Whilst I don't think they are as appealing to the eyes, sitting on them feels rather safe - to have the solid build of the ox beneath you - and don't take that the wrong way!

- Elephants - A slow ride that jolts you from left to right but an very fun ride not to miss. If you get a chance to experience it, you should also see them pee like a hose, feel their hairs spread sparsely across their back like spikes, and feed them bananas that seem to just disappear easily down their gaping mouth. Despite having enjoyed the elephant rides though, I must have seen one too many performing elephants - and the spikes they use to prod them in the soft spot just behind their ears - to do that many more times. Sure they do have thick skin, but I think I'm a bit too soft-hearted to bear the cruelty of it all.

- Ostridge - By far, this was the most uncomfortable ride! They're 'feathers' were like tree twigs, even through the thick cloth, but they're definitely fast runners and it is one fast ride! I'd hate to see what might happen if they are not kept covered in a head-bag used to keep them calm though. I think once is enough for me.

- Bucking Bronco - OK, so this isn't quite a 'green' ride nor is it really a form of transportation, but it's the best alternative to a rodeo bull! It's definitely good fun for all and apparently, I'm quite good with the balancing act!

Stress and cultures

The word 'stress' is derived from the Latin word 'stringere', meaning 'to draw tight'. The chronicity of work stress is nothing new and can be recognised by classic symptoms across the world including changes in eating, drinking, smoking patterns, irrtitability and moodiness, absent-mindedness, tiredness and exhaustion, anxiety and depression, and negativity and susceptibility to illness. However, puzzlingly, differences have been found in different cultures.


One phenomenon, for example, is the sudden death syndrome found particularly among Japanese executives whereby a higher proportion of Japanese chief executive offers have been found to die prematurely. It is not an exaggeration, nor a myth. For example, Japanese courts have ruled cases of employees dying from 'too much work' and in the one year period between 2006 and 2007, 147 of these cases of death from stress were acknowledged by the government. In fact, so many cases have been found there is name for it: karoshi.

Some of the hypotheses have suggested it may be caused by:


Over-identification with the employer/job - as most Japanese managers work for one firm for their entire careers
Perfectionism - as culture is such that individuals feel the need to please everyone and rise to high standards
Workaholic lifestyle - as most Japanese executives have relatively little time for family life, socialising for business purposes
Competitive business culture - which places them under constant pressure
Poor dietary habits - as business functions can cause consumption of high calorie, high cholesterol hors d'oeuvres and alcoholic drinks instead of dinner and there are tendencies to grab a quick bit while working late


While the things that cause stress may differ in different countries, work stress can occur in any culture - even the 5 stressor above can clearly be causes of ill health in all cultures. Which of these do you see affecting the working capacity of your friends and colleagues? More importantly, are any of these, or other stressors affecting your working capacity and health?


If you're feeling stressed or more anxious than you would like, take control and DO something about it. CCC Travel can help you with that. Why not try the free half hour consultation. What have you got to lose?

Charity Skydiving: on my own, first go

Having volunteered since the age of 13, I was quite eager once again to join ActionAid to raise money for a good cause...this time though I was even more excited with the opportunity to tick one of the items on my Bucket List off - skydiving.

Despite having the appearance of being a bit of an adrenaline junkie who loves roller coasters, wakeboarding and snowboarding, and always being keen to try new things, I am by no means without fear.Sitting at the top of a theme park ride that drops over a 100ft will certainly get my heart rising up to my throat in anticipation and the thought of standing on the top of a bridge just moments before bunjee jumping gets my blood thumping. The thought of skydiving, by myself on my first go, was no different but I was definitely up for the challenge.

For me, every difficult and scary situation is a challenge awaiting and the mental battle and overcoming of your own fear is one huge success. It was how I had learnt to push myself to my limits to learn to snowboard and overcome my fear of the increasing speed downhill, the greater slopes, and it was how I overcame the increased anticipation of more pain after 2 days of thudding falls and bruises. The leap of faith from a plane was a fear I knew I needed to overcome once the idea to try had entered my mind.

In preparation, first, I pushed all thoughts of the actual skydiving from my mind and battled the urge to run the play of events of doing the skydive, concentrating on raising the money. It worked - I managed to raise sufficient funds and did not shudder at the thought of jumping, on my own at all.


Second, I avoided any the possibility of being convinced not to do it by my parents, by not letting my parents know until only a week in advance as I knew they would attempt to persuade me to back out. Surprisingly, they were more supportive than I expected but I think that was just from experience. They knew that once I had decided to do it, I would go all the way and would not back out. So all I got was the "Be careful" talk, thankfully.


Third, I employed the support of my partner who drove there and spent the hours watching my training and providing my with moral support. It didn't take too much convincing but it actually left me with the added feeling of guilt as I watched him wait and do nothing whilst I went through my training.

So as it goes, I successfully managed to remain calm until my completion the information recall, plane jumping techniques, parachute releases, landing rolls and other training procedures in the few hours I had on the morning of my jump. But on seeing the small plane pull in in then climbing in, I was hit with my first wave of fear. My heart started beating faster and I had the tingly nervous sensation surging up to my throat. All I could do was wait.

We received more training on what to do in the plane then all boarded as instructed. As I faced the end of the small plane and as we flew up into the air, I noticed every small movement the small plane made which you would not normally feel in the large plane, and my second wave of panic came. Being one who gets travel sick with repeated sharp turns, the thought of having not thought of taking travel sickness pills beforehand and the possibility of feeling sick before even reaching out target height got to me. I was feeling a bit panicky and unsettled. Then as I noticed the 10 others in the plane who were skydiving with me, sat in our respective given positions my third wave of panic came, initiated by the thought that I could be the embarrassing one who would be unable to make the leap out of the plane and would be the one to hold others up.


However, it was on seeing the 3 others in front of me jumping one after the other that my desire to overcome the challenge kicked in and it was at that moment I decided I could not bear the embarrassment of being the only one not able to jump, more so than having to push myself in that split second to trust in my ability and safety. Peering out at the blue sky and clouds rushing by, I pushed myself out and my mind went blank - I did not remember the procedures, did not count as I was supposed to, but luckily, I managed to do what was required to release my chute.

As I floated down, I felt my success and the experience was definitely breathtaking, scary, exhilarating. More so, it was amazing to be able to say I jumped by myself on my first go. It was definitely an experience I would recommend, more as a great mental challenge than a physical one, if you happen to be looking for one!